Covered wagon medicine show Take you to the place where the healing flows, oh, oh Weak in spirit, we got the juice Won't save your soul it'll shine your shoes Treated king to kangaroo Santa Fe to Timbuktu, oh, oh Don't be fooled by imitation This is the stuff that cured a nation We took the tube and the high plains too Never stopped long just passing through A drop of the laughter of the maids of France Makes a hopeless cripple dance, oh It was really vile weather When we got tarred and feathered You could hear the six guns sound As they chased us out of town In India we're all the rave Discovered that it's great as aftershave Dropped in the sea just off Japan Swapped 20 bottles for an Aqua Walkman, oh Immunity from ridicule Improves your brains if you're a fool, oh, oh And I read in the Middle East They traded some for a hostage release Now, if you're bald it'll give you hair If you got straight trousers it'll give you flares Feeling up you'll get depressed Out of style here's a brand new dress, oh It was really vile weather When we got tarred and feathered You could hear the six guns sound As they chased us out of town The stuff we sell is just the best Passing all consumer test, oh, oh Days of Heaven nights of sin Voodoo stick and sharks fin When all around you seems like Hell Just one sip will make you well, oh, oh Multipurpose in a jar If you ain't ill it'll fix your car In days of yore for all bad feelings Washing socks and stripping ceilings Nowadays it's used medicinally For all known human malady, oh It was really vile weather When we got tarred and feathered You could hear the six guns sound As they chased us out of town, oh
